There is always something isn't there? So my IL's decided to take the children shopping this year instead of buying presents. This earned 4 thumbs up from me (again with the big toes as thumbs). The boys got coordinating suits, black with white pinstripes and red ties. The girls got coordinating dresses, red with red glitter, black tights and black sweaters. Neall has a red dress shirt and a black/white steampunky (google steampunk if you're curious) tie and black pants. Suddenly we have the makings of a matchy-matchy holiday! I would be telling a lie if I said I wasn't that kind of mom. I LOVE coordinating outfits for special occasions. So back to the story. My IL's hand me a bit of money and instruct me to find myself an outfit that goes with the theme of all of the others. Well, I agree to try. I have a black skirt (that I wore at dh's holiday party last year). I clap gleefully to myself when I remember this. As quickly as my excitement comes, it goes. I have nothing red. NO...THING. No wait, I have a long sleeved t-shirt. Not exactly what I had in mind. So now I am faced with a conundrum. Do I even dare consider going shopping so close to Christmas to find something red? It sounds crazy even typed out. I found myself accidentally at the mall last night but found NOTHING. NO...THING. But... the mall is open tomorrow until 7. I could go and find something. I'm leaning toward a scarf, or a feathery hair clip or a pin or something. I have a white blouse that would be fine. A scarf would be ideal. I'm picky. It's Christmas Eve. The mall is going to be insane. I am going to the mall on Saturday (shhh, don't tell the kids). Do I REALLY need something red? Really? REALLY. We'll see if my secret love of coordinating outfits is enough to drive me to the mall tomorrow. Stay tuned. If I do go I'm sure there will be an interesting story to relay afterwards.
Also in the last-minute category is the turkey. Now, the only reason I'm doing turkey is because I had one in the freezer. It was really a cop-out. I just didn't want to figure out what else we could eat instead. I was being lazy. So Neall brought it up from the deep freeze a couple of days ago. This morning it was still frozen solid. Not a smidge of thaw despite being in the refrigerator for 36 hours or so. So I decided I had to brine it. Not only is brining delicious, but it also thaws the bird out. The big problem with brining a Turkey is that they make it look SO EASY on TV. While the recipe aspect is rather simple, finding a container that is large enough is NOT. In years passed I have purchased a 5gal bucket from a home store specifically for this purpose. Currently that bucket has mudding compound in it from redoing the bathroom. Not an option. So I hastily settle on a Rubbermaid tub. I evict the clothing contents into a garbage bag wishing them a joyous season in their new baggie home. I scrub the old Rubbermaid tub (which I shall henceforth refer to as a bucket since that's what I always call them) and rinse it. From here on out you can consider this a "recipe".
1. Into the bucket put enough cold water to cover the bathing bird.
2. Add 1 cup salt per 1 1/2 gallons of water. (Or, as I do, dump salt until you feel like it is enough).
3. Roughly chop onions and citrus fruit, add to bucket of water. (I used grapefruit and oranges, you can use whatever you have).
4. Throw in the dregs of any citrus juice you find in your fridge. (For me this was about a cup of lime and lemon juice)
5. Toss in seasonings that smell good. (It is my cooking motto that if it smells good it probably tastes good. Try it sometime, you'll see I'm right).
6. Get a spoon or spatula or whatever and give it a good stir.
7. Now plop in the bird. Cover bucket with lid.
8. Refrigerate, place outside in cold weather (well protected from turkey hunters), or add ice to the water to keep mr gobblegobble cold
9. After brining for 24 hours, longer if chirpy was frozen when you started, remove from brine and dry with paper towels or kitchen towels you can bleach.
10. Once dry rub inside and out with herbs and a bit more salt if you'd like.
11. Bake bird in oven. I do not baste. I like to salt the outside with a good sea salt before baking and let the skin get nice and crispy. The salt on the outer layer will pull the moisture from the skin allowing it to get nice and crispy. Basting makes it soggy. Even though I am Simply Soggy, I hate soggy turkey. The crisp skin keeps the moisture where it belongs, inside the muscle of the turkey, making it moist and delicious.
12. Ta-da, yummy turkey. Be sure to roast thoroughly blah blah salmonella blah blah. Holiday puking should be reserved for overindulgance of drink, not food poisoning. Yes, this is part of the recipe. Feel free to submit this to your church recipe book.
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